A beautiful drive down Chuckanut, dinner at The Rhododendron Cafe, Cat Stevens on the ipod, a scenic drive, LaConner, The Wild Iris, yummy cookies, chocolates and champagne, watched Goodwill Hunting, delicious breakfast, antique stores and boutiques, lunch at the Calico Cupboard, more antique stores and boutiques, reading, dinner at El Gitano, watched Pride and Prejudice, another delicious breakfast, fresh fruit from the market, take out lunch from Calico Cupboard, scenic drive, Jars of Clay on the ipod, Deception Pass, Rosario Beach, reading, sunburn, and then home. Here are some of our self-portraits from the weekend…
We had a fantastic time! I can hardly imagine how much the next decade will hold for us. We talked a lot about the challenges and joys the next 10 years could possibly bring. We are excited and also feel the need to prepare– especially for those teenage years.
Thank you so much Cam for planning this weekend away for us!
Your hearts are filled with happiness
so great and overflowing
You cannot comprehend it,
for it’s far beyond all knowing
How any heart could hold such joy
or feel the fullness of
The wonder and the glory
and the ecstacy of love.
You wish that you could capture it
and never let it go
So you might walk forever
in its magic, radiant glow.
And love in all its ecstacy
is such a fragile thing,
Like gossamer in cloudless skies
or a hummingbird’s small wing.
And love that lasts forever
must be made of something strong-
The kind of strength that’s gathered
when the heart can hear no song.
When the sunshine of your wedding day
runs into stormy weather,
and hand in hand you brave the gale
and climb steep hills together,
And, clinging to each other
while the thunder rolls above,
You seek divine protection
in faith and hope and love.
For days of wine and roses
never make love’s dreams come true-
It takes sacrifice and teardrops
and problems shared by two.
To give true love its beauty,
its grandeur, and its finesse,
And to mold an earthly ecstasy
into heavenly diviness.
I took these pictures of Aliza at Cambria’s the other day. We were there celebrating Gretchen’s first Birthday (I can’t believe it’s been a year already). Gretchen is such a cutie and it’s been fun to watch her grow up this last year. You can see more pictures of the birthday here.
Aliza is one of my favorite photography subjects as I am sure you have noticed, hence the pictures below. I just love taking pictures! It is one of my most favorite things to do. I love how you can capture time, memories, expressions, and emotion in a photograph. I love how pictures can take you back to how you felt and what you thought (good or bad) when the image was captured or how you can watch your kids grow up all over again.
Cambria generously let me use her camera (Canon xti with 50mm fixed 1.8 lens) to take these pictures. So, on to the whining part–I REALLY want a new camera, in fact I would be really happy with the exact set up that Cambria has. I never plan on being a professional photographer, I would just like to be able to get really great pictures of my family and friends. I get by with my little Canon “point and shoot” but there’s so much more I could do and learn with a digital SLR.
I am very blessed and God has been more than good to me and our family so I really shouldn’t whine about a camera but I still feel like whining about it! Multiple times we have set aside money and a time for when we could purchase a new camera but something unforeseen always comes up– which we are then very thankful we had the resources to cover. Again, I remind myself, God continues to bless us beyond our expectations year after year and I really should not complain. See how this works? I do this back and forth thing, counting my blessings and then whining, at least 4 or 5 times a week.
In the scope of what’s important in life, I do realize this doesn’t even show up on the radar. I’m just being honest. Sometimes I feel like whining. The feeling usually doesn’t last long. Actually, it’s pretty much gone now. Cam has been so good for me in this area! He doesn’t whine and it’s about the only thing he doesn’t have much patience for. I may or may not get a new camera but I will continue to love taking pictures, remember to be thankful for all the beauty that God has put in my life and try not to whine (too much).
time with a good friend, shoe shopping and yummy frozen yogurt…
Does it get any better than that?
On a whim, I called my good friend Cambria this afternoon to see if by some miracle we could spontaneously coordinate our schedules to get out for a little kid-free time this afternoon. Dates like that are a rarity these days for both of us. It was fun to spend time together today and be able to actually finish a sentence without one of us needing to answer a question or attend to a child.
We went to Fairhaven and checked out my friend Nia’s new shop. It’s a really cute place with lots of fun, one of kind items. I love the new blues and browns that are currently popular in decorating and I am now inspired to paint our office/craft room. From there we moved on to one of my most favorite activities– shoe shopping! I’ve been on a mission to find a cute, comfortable pair of shoes that are versatile enough to wear with jeans, capris, shorts or whatever. I found this pair at Hilton’s. I don’t know if the picture really does them justice. They are really cute on and super comfortable.
We shopped around downtown for a little while in some of the little boutiques– it made me feel old, but we had fun. I had never been to The Red Berry so we stopped in there for some delicious frozen yogurt. If you live in Bellingham you have to go check it out, it’s on Holly St. near Bob’s Burger and Brew.
We had a really full morning (Walk for Life, Soccer, and Baseball) so the pace of this afternoon was just right after all that! It was a nice treat to get out and spend some time with a good friend, pick up some new shoes, have a yummy treat and–it’s not even Mother’s Day yet!
While the rest of Bellingham was taking spring break this week, we didn’t. We leave for Disneyland in six weeks and I want to be mostly done with school when we get back so we chose to not take a break this week. We have a lot going on right now and I imagine the next several weeks will just fly by. Spring sports season is a bit crazy for our family. Caleb has 1 soccer practice and 1 game each week and Sean has 2 baseball practices and 2 games each week. The boys both have games on Saturdays but that pretty much means we have something sports related every day of the week except Sunday (well, except for Sunday, the 20th when we’ll play a make-up soccer game). It is so much fun to watch them play and see them learn and improve in their athletic abilities.
The boys have accomplished so much in school this year! I am really thrilled at how far they have come and how excited they both continue to be about learning. Sean is finding Math to be a bit more difficult lately but I think it’s good. We changed Math curriculum a few weeks ago to give him something more challenging. He is now working on more complicated multiplication and division. We learned about ancient Greece in History this week and about how the Olympics came to be. Last Sunday the boys picked out some new books (thanks Grandma Terri) and they have been reading like crazy all week. Caleb is getting ready to take his standardized test on Monday (homeschoolers over the age of eight are required to take them each year). We have been practicing test taking skills and doing fill in the bubble practice tests. Sean will take his tests starting Monday, April 28th
A Woman’s Heart: God’s Dwelling Place started on Wednesday. The homework is extensive and amazing. As always, I am really looking forward to where God and I will go together on this journey. Every Bible study I have done over the last few years has represented a new season and a new journey with God. It still amazes me that He pursues me and continues to reveal Himself in new, mind-blowing, and awesome ways. I am praying that God will open my mind and my heart to let His truth take root in my life through this study.
I have one week left of my training at WCPC. I can’t believe how fast these 6 weeks have gone by. The training has been very thorough but I wouldn’t say I feel like I am absolutely prepared. I am glad that we will be partnering with a more experienced counselor for several weeks. The Walk for Life is about a month away and I will be sharing information and encouraging women in my Bible study to get involved one way or another in a couple weeks. I am thankful for this opportunity and also humbled. I know this is where God wants me to be serving but I also feel inadequate. And the truth is, I am. I can’t succeed at anything without God’s help. My options are to rely completely on Him and give Him credit for it all or rely on myself and hold myself responsible for the success or failure that results. It seems like an clear and simple choice but I can’t seem to consistently figure this out.
I read this today and found it to be so exactly what I needed to hear. Here’s the portion that really spoke to me:
“Will-powered faith is the worst kind of faith. A relationship with God that is rooted in our ability or strength is doomed to fail for two reasons. First, a will-powered faith will result in self-loathing. We make commitments, try our hardest, give it our all, and fail. So we try again…and fail. And the only person we have to blame is ourselves. Some of us suffer from a spiritual depression because we have lived in a cycle between trying and failing for so long. Second, if our will-powered faith doesn’t end in self-loathing it is because it ended in self-righteousness. We make commitments, try our hardest, and we succeed. We congratulate ourselves on a job well done. Then we look around and notice that other people are not experiencing the same success we are. Why don’t they try as hard as me? Maybe they are just not as godly. Self-loathing or self-righteousness—God hates both.” Curtis Jones, LPM Blog
I definitely can relate to the self-loathing side of things. I struggle to honestly asses myself. I am highly critical and extend very little grace to myself. When I have operated at that critical level for a long period of time, I then justify giving myself a break by getting in a rebellious and entitled space– which is neither healthy or helpful spiritually or otherwise. I try too hard and then I just stop trying. I don’t know how to not operate by my own will-power. I feel weak and aimless. It’s a struggle for me to understand that my worth comes not from what I do (how I love, how I serve, how I spend my time, how I fail, how I disappoint) but from the one and only fact that I am a child of God in whom He delights and dearly loves. Continually I ask God to teach me how to rest in Him, to trust Him and to teach me how to have genuine faith, not “will-powered faith”. One day I hope to say that I have learned this lesson and then I can move on to the many other lessons on the list that need some attention.
I need to express my deepest gratitude to God for putting Cam in my life. Cam is supremely patient and at times the most selfless person I have ever known. Even in the midst of conflict with me (when I am being totally unreasonable) he can put aside his hurt feelings and reach out to me with words of encouragement and good counsel. I am blessed beyond measure to share life with Cam and I am sorry for everyday that I forget that fact. God has taught me so much through him. The relationship Cam and I share provides safety and stability and as a result I am much more responsive and receptive to God’s loving pursuit. So, thank you God for loving me so much that not only did you send your Son for my salvation but you sent Cameron to love me and save my heart.
How can it be that there are Jars of Clay songs that I haven’t heard until today?? I was listening to the radio this afternoon and heard this song and was so puzzled– apparently I missed that there were a couple songs on Furthermore that I didn’t already own. Anyway, this song I heard today is beautiful and maybe I wasn’t supposed to discover it until now? It does seem to be the very thing God and I are working out right now. I thought I’d share the lyrics here:
I really love reading to the boys. Most recently, I have been reading The Phantom Tollbooth to Sean and Caleb. This is a great book to read aloud. It is full of rich language and elaborate descriptions. I have appreciated the meaning and message the book subtly and artistically includes. Here’s an excerpt from what we read tonight. Milo (the main character) and Alec another boy just entered the city called “Reality”.
“Many years ago, on this very spot there was a beautiful city of fine houses and inviting spaces, and no one who ever lived here was ever in a hurry. The streets were full of wonderful things to see and the people would often stop and look at them.”
“Didn’t they have any place to go?” asked Milo.
“To be sure, ” continued Alec; “but, as you know, the most important reason for going from one place to another is to see what’s in between, and they took great pleasure in doing just that. Then one day someone discovered that if you walked as fast as possible and looked at nothing but your shoes you would arrive at your destination much more quickly. Soon everyone was doing it. They all rushed down the avenues and hurried along the boulevards seeing nothing of the wonders and beauties of their city as they went.”
Milo remembered the many times he’d done the very same thing; and, as hard as he tried, there were even things on his own street that he couldn’t remember.
“No one paid any attention to how things looked, and as they moved faster and faster everything grew uglier and dirtier, and as everything grew uglier and dirtier they moved faster and faster, and at last a very strange thing began to happen. Because nobody cared, the city slowly began to disappear. Day by day the buildings grew fainter and fainter, and the streets faded away, until at last it was entirely invisible. There was nothing to see at all.”
Thank you for working your “magic” and making my Blog dreams come true!
I love you TONS (and not just because you are wicked smart and talented). Thanks for your patience and for everything you have taught me along the way.
I read this really amazing post several weeks ago that my old friend Kirsten wrote and it’s really stuck with me. I have found myself thinking about it quite often. This post will not be nearly as eloquent or much of an apology or reconciliation — I’m just not there yet. However, I was inspired by her and thought I would note it. I have been thinking for a while that I should, in some small way, document my journey with Pain. I think it may be easier to start with the present and work my way backward. read more…
I haven’t been inspired to post much lately. There’s plenty going on right now but nothing is resolved and when I am unsettled I find it difficult to know what to say. As it looks right now, things will be likely unchanged for sometime and I am realizing that I need to not get stuck here and fixate on what I can’t change. I have spent a fair bit of time thinking and reflecting on where God has been at work and what He has been trying to teach me. I figured it would be good to at least post my reflections here for myself so that I can remember someday in the future.
God is definitely at work and I see His fingerprints all around us and in us. Without going into too much detail, I’ll just say Cam and I have grown so much in the last 18+ months. We have grown personally and more importantly as a couple. We have learned to depend on each other for support and to cheer each other on. It seems silly, in a way, that we have struggled so much through this time of challenge considering the other types of true hardship and tragedy people face everyday. Fortunately, this struggle originated outside of our relationship, our home, our health or our church. The boys and I have watched Cam wrestle with God’s plan for his life and ultimately choose to surrender his will to God (and we couldn’t be prouder of him).
This past Friday (February 8th) Cam and I celebrated the 13th anniversary of us as a couple. I can hardly remember the beginning because it just feels like we have always been a “we”. We have come a long way! As I think back on that time in our lives I realize I really put Cam in the place of my savior in my life. I saw Cam as an answer to my fears and insecurities. I found someone who loved me for me, who wanted the best for me no matter the cost, who would stand up for me, who would challenge me and who wouldn’t give up on me (I think/hope he saw some of that in me too). But eventually my “savior”, who was really just a boy doing his best to love this girl, couldn’t meet those needs perfectly, and disappointment followed. It was an unfair position to put Cam in and it was a huge relief for both of us when Jesus was restored to His rightful place as Savior in my life.
Although our relationship began in a rather co-dependent and dysfunctional way, God has been so faithful and patient to teach Cam and I how to love each other well. To be filled with His love first and give from the overflow. I can honestly say that I think being married is the best! I absolutely love sharing life with Cam. I love that we have grown up together and have shared our most precious memories. We don’t get it right all of them time. We still struggle to be selfless and to put each others needs above our own. Our personalities and love languages couldn’t be more different from each other. We’ve had to really trust each other and see past what’s on the surface and into each other’s hearts. One thing I am confident about is that our boys know we absolutely love each other and that we are all-in — forever. That is the legacy we will leave in our family.
As Cam has faced challenges and discouragement over the last year I have been praying that God would bless him. I shared with him the other day that I had been praying for blessing for him and his response was so much more than I expected. He said that I am the blessing. It hadn’t occurred to me that as I prayed for Cam, God was changing me and that I would become an provision of that blessing I had been praying for. These last months have taught me how to be the kind of wife Cam needs, someone who loves him no matter what, who challenges him but is also a soft place to fall when he is broken (and at times it has felt like a full time job). The work that God has done in my life to help me become that person is unbelievable to me and I am profoundly humbled by His grace and patience with me.
Reflecting is important from time to time but I think looking back too long can be detrimental. I am not satisfied to stop here. I want to continue to pursue God’s best for me, for Cam and for our family.
Today I begin a new bible study at CTK, my 6th Beth Moore study. I have thought a lot about the idea of whether or not it’s good to stay with one teacher for so long. After much thought and prayer I have determined that Beth is a very gifted teacher, I learn so much more with each study I complete, I have been pretty much non-stop in a bible study for almost 3 years now (which can’t be a bad thing), and she’s not the only teacher in my life, so, why re-invent the wheel? I appreciate transparent and vulnerable teachers who are “not ashamed of the gospel” and don’t fear telling the truth in love. I feel so privileged and thankful to live in a time where I can access so many gifted teachers. I love Chuck Swindol’s Insight for Living online devotion, watching Pastor Mark Driscoll’s messages from Mars Hill online, Beth’s studies with the DVD teaching, and Pastor Grant’s messages each weekend a CTK. I am grateful that God continues to reveal Himself to me and teaches me how to be the woman He created me to be.
A couple of weeks ago I bought Chris Rice’s album Peace Like a River: The Hymns Project. I have been listening to it repeatedly since I bought it. Growing up in a very conservative church where we sang mostly hymns, I became acquainted with many of the great ones. As a child I couldn’t appreciate the sentiment or power of the words in many of those old songs, so I decided they were boring and antiquated. How can you understand God’s great faithfulness, amazing grace, how mighty He is, and how enduring His love is until you have lived life awhile? We need time to learn to trust Him with something precious, time to rebel and transgress to understand grace, time to see miracles only explained by God’s providence, and experience suffering to the point of needing to rely on Him alone. I am so thankful for a God that allows us the freedom to learn to trust Him. I am thankful that He is faithful even in our questions, fear and doubt and that He unfailingly pursues us.
My favorite Hymn on the album is Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing. The depth and beauty of the lyrics captivate me. It embodies what my soul feels yet cannot as eloquently express.
Come Thou Fount of every blessing
Tune my heart to sing Thy grace;
Streams of mercy, never ceasing,
Call for songs of loudest praise
Teach me some melodious sonnet,
Sung by flaming tongues above.
Praise the mount! I’m fixed upon it,
Mount of God’s unchanging love.
Here I raise my Ebenezer;
Hither by Thy help I’m come;
And I hope, by Thy good pleasure,
Safely to arrive at home.
Jesus sought me when a stranger,
Wandering from the fold of God;
He, to rescue me from danger,
Interposed His precious blood.
O to grace how great a debtor
Daily I’m constrained to be!
Let that grace now like a fetter,
Bind my wandering heart to Thee.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
Prone to leave the God I love;
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it,
Seal it for Thy courts above.
O that day when freed from sinning,
I shall see Thy lovely face;
Clothed then in blood washed linen
How I’ll sing Thy sovereign grace;
Come, my Lord, no longer tarry,
Take my ransomed soul away;
Send thine angels now to carry
Me to realms of endless days.
After a few days of listening to this song I began to wonder what an “Ebenezer” was. The reference is from 1 Samuel 7:12. “Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen. He named it Ebenezer, saying, ‘Thus far the LORD helped us’.” All throughout the Old Testament the Israelites would set up stones of remembrance as a testimony to God’s mercy and presence for the generations to come. In Genesis 26:18, Jacob gives the name Bethel, meaning House of God, to the stone which he had used as a place to rest his head while receiving the dream of the ladder. He says, “Surely the LORD is in this place, and I was not aware of it.” Later, that very same place is so defiled and misused that it was renamed by the prophet Hosea, Beth Aven, which means House of Nothingness.
In Joshua chapter four, there is another example of stones being set up in remembrance of God leading. God tells Joshua, “Go over before the ark of the LORD your God into the middle of the Jordan. Each of you is to take up a stone on his shoulder, according to the number of the tribes of the Israelites, to serve as a sign among you. In the future, when your children ask you, ‘What do these stones mean?’ tell them that the flow of the Jordan was cut off before the ark of the covenant of the LORD. When it crossed the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. These stones are to be a memorial to the people of Israel forever.” The place was named Gilgal, because it was the place where God rolled away the reproach of the Egyptians.
In Amos chapter five there is a call for repentance of Israel.“This is what the LORD says to the house of Israel: ‘Seek me and live; do not seek Bethel, do not go to Gilgal, do not journey to Beersheba. For Gilgal will surely go into exile, and Bethel will be reduced to nothing. ‘Seek the LORD and live…”
Sadly, many of the sacred symbols of God’s faithfulness later became idols. No longer were people remembering and seeking the Faithful One; they began to worship the monument and even defile the sacred. As awful an appalling as that thought is, I find I struggle with this very thing. I sometimes supplant the worship of God Himself with the praise for the outcome that results from His work, or, even worse, I complain about where God has rescued me to. As time passes and I get further from my crisis, my memory of God’s help thus far fades and I forget to continue to “seek the LORD”.
The line “Prone to wander, Lord I feel it, Prone to leave the God I love” breaks my heart every time I hear it. How true it is. No matter how many times God demonstrates His love to me and no matter how much I love Him in return, I am “prone to leave the God I love”. Not necessarily by an act of rebellion or anger but by distraction or laziness.
I desire to leave a legacy of faith and faithfulness for my family. I want the “stones of remembrance” in my life to always point to God alone and serve solely as a reminder of His goodness. I do not want what God has intended as a place of remembrance to become a stumbling stone of pride or an idol. I am beginning to understand that this kind of heritage does not come about accidentally, it has to be an intentional decision made daily. I cannot will it to be and it is impossible for me without God’s help.
“On that day, freed from sinning, I shall see Thy lovely face” — I can hardly wait!
Here’s the video that Betsy promised. It was a great honor for me to be able to share in the experience w/ Sean and I’m so grateful that he asked me to participate.
Things are winding down here at Toolhouse. I’ll be at Audience Central Thursday and Friday of this week, and I’ll probably only be in the office (at Toolhouse) a couple of days next week as well. I’m hoping to take some time next week to take care of some other projects that have been piling up at home and with outside work.
I’ve started compiling my thoughts on my tenure at Toolhouse, and I hope to post them soon.
I’ve often said that Bellingham is a very small town. No matter where I go or who I meet, we always end up being connected via some other avenue beyond the one at hand.
For instance, yesterday, I was reviewing a few of the resumes that have come in for the position that was created by my decision to leave Toolhouse. While exploring the website of one of the applicants, and following the trail of links, I stumbled upon the site of a guy that I worked with at summer camp eleven years ago.
Or, how about two months ago, when Toolhouse hired a new production manager? Turns out she went to WWU with one of my oldest friends. Not only that, my dad once fired her partner.
My birthday’s coming up (May 26th, for those not in the know), so I thought it would be a good time to start posting things that are on my “wishlist”.
I should point out that many of these things aren’t practical birthday gifts, and I’m not posting them as gift suggestions. Birthdays do, however, involve gifts, so I was in that “what stuff do I want” mindset.
After five and a half years with Toolhouse, I’ve decided to move on. I’ve accepted a position at AudienceCentral.
Toolhouse continues to be a growing and successful company and I wish them continued success as I move forward in my career. I’ve learned and grown a lot during my time here, and continue to believe that it is a great place to work.
I’ll still be at Toolhouse for the next few weeks to wrap things up, and will be starting at Audience Central in mid-June.
Since finishing the marathon, I’ve realized that I need to keep exercising. Often. I think for now, I’ll definitely continue running, but I’ll focus on maintaining a manageable number of miles per week, probably in the neighborhood of 20-30 miles per week. At least until I have to start training for next year’s Portland Marathon, which will probably begin around the end of May.
I’ve also been looking into cycling. It’s a little less hard on the joints, which is probably a good thing considering I’m a pretty big guy at 6′ 2″, 250 lbs. The Cascade Bicycle Club has an annual ride from Seattle to Portland that looks interesting. Recently, one of my coworkers, a cycling enthusiast, showed me around the cycling equipment world at a nearby local bike shop for which he used to work.
All told, a basic setup is probably going to cost between $1750 - $2000 for a decent bike, pedals, shoes, bike rack, a new helmet and other assorted equipment and apparel.
I think I may even be able to find a few people around town to train and ride with.
It’s been a while since I’ve posted an update on my training for the Portland Marathon. Well, I haven’t stopped training and, in fact, the race is just a little over two weeks away on October 9th. I’m tapering down my training now to get rested for the race.
Things have been super busy at work and at home, so I’ll post my backlog of running diary/log entries when I get a chance.
I’ve been needing extra time to recover from the long runs the last few times, but I think that by skipping the Day 1 run altogether, I’m doing myself a disservice. So today, instead of skipping it, I just made it a little lower impact and I think it’ll help me to have better success in the other runs this week.
As anyone who reads this site with any regularity can see, I’m not the fastest bloke on the planet. That’s no problem for me, but it led to a funny exchange during my 14 mile run.
Guy On The Trail: “That’s a good pace you’ve got there. Not trying to kill yourself or anything.”
Me: “Well, I’ve got ten miles left.”
Guy: “How many total?”
Me: “Fourteen.”
Guy: “Oh, so you are trying to kill yourself!”
After the first 6.1 miles, I ran back by my house and picked up my sister-in-law’s boyfriend, Shane who ran the last 7.9 miles with me. (Here’s a pic of Shane and Holly, Betsy’s sister.)
12 miles is a long way. Ran it today (Monday) instead of on Sunday, as I normally would, because we were out of town and it was 90+ degrees where we were.
Taking the week off seemed to work out well. I finished today with less pain than after the 7 mile run, and I felt like I still had some gas in the tank when I finished. Next week is 10 miles. We’ll see how that goes.
Ok, a quick update. Week 4 of my training should’ve started on July 5th. However, I was traveling out of town all week and it cramped my ability to keep up with my training as well as I would’ve liked. I did run about 5 miles one of the days that I was out of town, but I skipped both the 3 mile runs and I still haven’t run the 8 mile, which I was supposed to run on Sunday. It’s tough to run 8 miles when you’re traveling from 5:30 a.m. to 7:00 p.m. Needless to say, I’m a little behind.
Fortunately, I had an extra week difference between when I started training and what the schedule called for. I had intended to double up Week 5 and just do it twice, but I think what I’ll actually end up doing is stretching Week 4 out over two weeks. This’ll hopefully do two things. First, it’ll give my knee a shot at getting better before I try to attempt 8 miles. Also, it’ll keep me from over-exerting myself trying to just overcome the gaps I left in my training. I think this’ll be good, because I don’t want to injure myself and not be able to finish my training. Anyway, watch for the real Week 4 to start tomorrow (Tuseday, July 12th).
I forgot to charge my Forerunner before today’s run, so I simply ran for a little over 70 minutes and figured that was close enough as I pretty consistently average around a 10 minute mile. I also ran with my brother-in-law and our pace over the distances that I knew for sure were way ahead of that pace. My knee is killing me.
I’m still fighting the Iliotibial Band problems, hence the crappy performance on Wednesday. I tried to rest and stretch Thursday and Friday, and ran a little later in the day on Friday. I was a little slow, and had some pain, but it was manageable. I’m going to try running with a brace on Sunday. This morning, I couldn’t even move without my knee hurting terribly. I think I aggravate it at night by turning over in my sleep and torquing it in funny ways. Maybe I should sleep with a brace on.
We had a fantastic time! I can hardly imagine how much the next decade will hold for us. We talked a lot about the challenges and joys the next 10 years could possibly bring. We are excited and also feel the need to prepare– especially for those teenage years. 
Today I begin a new bible study at CTK, my 6th Beth Moore study. I have thought a lot about the idea of whether or not it’s good to stay with one teacher for so long. After much thought and prayer I have determined that Beth is a very gifted teacher, I learn so much more with each study I complete, I have been pretty much non-stop in a bible study for almost 3 years now (which can’t be a bad thing), and she’s not the only teacher in my life, so, why re-invent the wheel? I appreciate transparent and vulnerable teachers who are “not ashamed of the gospel” and don’t fear telling the truth in love. I feel so privileged and thankful to live in a time where I can access so many gifted teachers. I love Chuck Swindol’s 
Growing up in a very conservative church where we sang mostly hymns, I became acquainted with many of the great ones. As a child I couldn’t appreciate the sentiment or power of the words in many of those old songs, so I decided they were boring and antiquated. How can you understand God’s great faithfulness, amazing grace, how mighty He is, and how enduring His love is until you have lived life awhile? We need time to learn to trust Him with something precious, time to rebel and transgress to understand grace, time to see miracles only explained by God’s providence, and experience suffering to the point of needing to rely on Him alone. I am so thankful for a God that allows us the freedom to learn to trust Him. I am thankful that He is faithful even in our questions, fear and doubt and that He unfailingly pursues us.
I should point out that many of these things aren’t practical birthday gifts, and I’m not posting them as gift suggestions. Birthdays do, however, involve gifts, so I was in that “what stuff do I want” mindset.